March 25th, 2009 | 
Author: Right now I'm really in a slump.
I graduated from college with a major that I realized that I hate close to graduation. I've been applying to jobs in that field, just for the heck of it, but no response.
I've been applying to literally hundreds (via internet) jobs in unrelated fields, with extremely little feedback and no success.
I have no boyfriend, no one I'm interested in, and nobody interested in me.
My 2 best friends who I spent all my time with live–1 lives 1 hour away from me, the other lives 2 hours away from me– so I can't see them regularly.
My little sister, who dropped out of high school years ago, has a job that I completely envy right now, and I feel so inferior because I made such a big deal about putting myself through college.
My parents are very urgent and extremely disappointed that I'm not yet employed.
Oh yeah, and I've gained 10 pounds since the semester ended.
I don't know how to be positive or what to do with myself until I find a job and move out.
It's not unusual for a person to be depressed after achieving an important goal they've worked really hard for.
I can understand how hard it must be for you right now: you've tried so hard, and succeeded, and nobody gives a ***. Rather, you're getting grief from the people who could be giving you acknowledgement.
It's not kind. It's not fair. But it's real and true. It's life. "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly." My guess is that you're going through an "ugly" time. It, too, will pass.
For starters, check with your doctor. There may be a physical problem (e.g. thyroid) contributing to your difficulties.
The advertisers would like you to think otherwise, but a substantial majority of good jobs are never advertised. There may be exceptions, but I've never heard of anyone getting hired by applying 'cold' for an internet job. Applying (even a gazillion times) on the web for a job in a specialty you dislike – that sounds like (a friend of mine once said) "like kicking your own balls".
There have been a couple of times I've been really deep in despair. Not just self-pity, but having a really hard time with the real stuff in my life.
The one thing I've found that works in this kind of horrible situation is to work for other people who need help even more than I do. And, it's sad to say, there are always plenty of those. I'm not much of a believer, but I know that if I try to make this true:
"… for I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was in prison and you came to me",
it's not been a waste. Just about any kind of outward-ly oriented action is preferable to brooding over one's own troubles.
You need to open your life. Having one's interactions limited to two distant friends, a sister you envy, and parents with whom you share resentment – that's a recipe for misery.
You may find that getting out there and doing for others, will do you more good, emotionally and professionally, than you could have imagined.
Posted in Life Success Coach
Don't fret!! We all go through those stages in our lives. I have basically been without a job for over a year. My husband is furious with me, but if you're not getting hired by people or even responded to, there's nothing you can do. Tell your parents to take a good look at the job market right now-it's not very good. You don't have to take a career in what you got your degree in-IT'S YOUR LIFE…..DO WHAT YOU WANT. Just relax & good things will happen. I would suggest just keep on trying to find something that you will like & it will come to you. Hang in there.
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Did you ever thought about doing things you enjoy and taking a risk to find out what is it? Living for your family's dreams of you is one of the things you can hurt yourself mentally. I think you need to apply at jobs you may want to try. Not everybody finds the IT CAREER in their twenties. Sometimes it takes more than ten years.
About gaining weigh- I think its depression and stress that's part of your weight gain. Try to take a walk for 30 mins 4 times week or go to the gym to reflect on your life. Let loose. Do things that makes you happy. I feel like thats one of things you have not done yet.
I will let you know that there is many people who never had a chance to grad from college, so acknowledge the good things about you. It is great you acknowledge your problem and now you can take steps onto improving them. Remember, its not too late for anything. Start doing things you enjoy and know the good qualities about yourself that other people do see in you. Hope I've helped.
References :
Going back to college for a second degree is not a bad thing but try something you enjoy first not b/c of others expectation.
go back to school girl and major in something else. from the time i was 6 yrs old, i wanted to be a hairdresser. i talked of nothing else. i eat drank and slept hair my whole life. i dreamed of being a hair stylist to the stars. owning my own string of salons and being world famous. in my senior year of high school, my parents enrolled me in beauty college. i spent 3 hours aday in high school and 6 hours a day in beauty college except saturdays where i spent 8 hours a day. i discovered, once i graduated from training on a fake head of hair to practicing on real people with real hair, that i absolutely could not stand the feeling of other peoples hair on my hands. it drove me crazy. using gloves was out of the question. i wanted to drop out but my parents wouldnt hear of it. i was raised with the believe that you always finish what you start no matter how bad it is. i graduated and got my license but i never practise doing hair. i went back to school several times before i found that perfect job. i am qualified to do hair, electronic assembler (certified), preschool teacher and a host of other things. i finally found a job i enjoyed doing and i didnt need college to do it. i was luck enough to be given a job in the accounting department at an office i already was working in. this job was just a job until something better came along. the accounting job was just the ticket. i was on the job trained. it started out being given little jobs a 10 year old could do. soon, thru my own interest in accounting, i learned all aspects of the accounts payable department. pretty soon, i was more knowledgable and capable then the other 2 "helpers". when the supervisor quit, i performed her duties until another supervisor could replace her. once a new super was found, i trained her. i was disappointed that i wasnt given the job that i had to train someone else for. the reason was, due to contract requirements only a degreed person in that field could hold that position. so back to school i went got my degree and life is sweet, fulfilling and best of all im fully self supporting. good luck go back to school while your still young.
References :
It's not unusual for a person to be depressed after achieving an important goal they've worked really hard for.
I can understand how hard it must be for you right now: you've tried so hard, and succeeded, and nobody gives a ***. Rather, you're getting grief from the people who could be giving you acknowledgement.
It's not kind. It's not fair. But it's real and true. It's life. "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly." My guess is that you're going through an "ugly" time. It, too, will pass.
For starters, check with your doctor. There may be a physical problem (e.g. thyroid) contributing to your difficulties.
The advertisers would like you to think otherwise, but a substantial majority of good jobs are never advertised. There may be exceptions, but I've never heard of anyone getting hired by applying 'cold' for an internet job. Applying (even a gazillion times) on the web for a job in a specialty you dislike – that sounds like (a friend of mine once said) "like kicking your own balls".
There have been a couple of times I've been really deep in despair. Not just self-pity, but having a really hard time with the real stuff in my life.
The one thing I've found that works in this kind of horrible situation is to work for other people who need help even more than I do. And, it's sad to say, there are always plenty of those. I'm not much of a believer, but I know that if I try to make this true:
"… for I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was in prison and you came to me",
it's not been a waste. Just about any kind of outward-ly oriented action is preferable to brooding over one's own troubles.
You need to open your life. Having one's interactions limited to two distant friends, a sister you envy, and parents with whom you share resentment – that's a recipe for misery.
You may find that getting out there and doing for others, will do you more good, emotionally and professionally, than you could have imagined.
References :